The best thing that has ever happened in my life, has been parenting our 4 amazing children. All my life I wanted 4 children, and after many miscarriages, I finally managed to have my 1st precious baby. Six years later we were blessed with our 4th child. My dream had come true, and I was finally the Mom of 4 perfect children. It never mattered to me what sex they were going to be, as long as they were all healthy and happy.
Even before our 1st baby was born, I was quite sure that I wanted to be the most perfect mother. We went to ante natal classes, I read loads and loads of books, and basically prepared myself in every way for this journey. Once, Kerri-Lee was born, I went weekly to Baby Boomers, where we were taught how to be the perfect Moms. They covered everything from nappy changing, to breastfeeding etc etc etc. And, most importantly, they weighed our babies weekly, to ensure that they were gaining the correct amount of weight.
In amongst all this perfectionism, there was a part of me, that wasn’t feeling quite sure about everything that I was reading about, and being told to do. For example, we were told we had to feed every 4 hours on the dot, and for only 10 minutes on each breast. We were also told, that if our babies woke up at night in between feeds, that we were to let them cry, until they fell asleep, and then woke up for their planned feed.
I knew the 1st time that we tried to leave Kerri-Lee to cry that it was not going to work for us. Our baby was being traumatised, and so were we. After a few minutes, I rushed in and picked her up, and held and hugged her. She calmed down immediately, so it was clear to me that she needed to be loved, not just fed every 4 hours. Within a week or so, I changed from this rigid feeding ritual, to feeding her on demand. And, oh, what a relief. Within a month of feeding her for as long as she wished to feed, and on demand, she had slept through the night.
Time passed, and our other amazing children were brought into this world. We went through the nappies, breastfeeding, nursery school, school, and now working and university. I realised more and more, that I was using intuition in my child rearing rather than being told what the right thing was to do.
Looking back, I have learnt so much, and yet, as a parent, we never stop learning. I have learnt that it is wonderful to get advice, but if your gut feel tells you it is not going to work for you, you don’t have to follow it. I have learnt that our children can never have too much love, as that is the basis of all of their security. I have learnt to treasure every single day with my children. I have learnt that we all make mistakes, but we don’t need to have regrets.
Life Retreat: http://www.liferetreat.co.za, is a blog/ website that my daughters, and myself have recently launched. We do daily blogs, on living a healthy, happy and balanced lifestyle. Our motto: is live – embrace – love – cherish, and we endeavour to live by this, and to inspire other to as well. Our articles include health, exercise, parenting, makeup, lifestyle, events, and so much more. This website is worth a daily visit.
Awaken Your Feminine Essence: Click here
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